I love my mother dearly, but I'm often mortified by the things she wears. So I'd like to steer her choice of wedding-day attire without offending her. Any suggestions?
It's important for your mother to feel good in what she wears on your wedding day, so above all you need to be prepared to graciously accept her own sense of style. That said, you could suggest a mother-daughter outing during which you shop for her ensemble and perhaps run other wedding-related errands. Stop by a few of her favorite stores, then be ready to offer impartial comments and suggestions such as, "How about trying this dress? I have a feeling it will look great on you," or "I'm not sure that's the best color for you. Maybe this blue would be better." If the two of you live in different cities, you could also make recommendations by e-mailing her links to looks she'd like- and you could live with.
What should the mother of the groom wear? Is it true that she has to wait to choose a dress until the mother of the bride has chosen hers? Should the mothers be color-coordinated?
The mother of the groom should select an outfit she feels comfortable wearing and that's appropriate for the time of day and formality of the wedding. Traditionally the mother of the bride contacts the groom's mother to let her know what style and shade she has chosen. The mother of the groom then picks something in a color that complements - but doesn't exactly match - the attire of the bride's mother and the attendants. As for who calls whom, the mother of the groom shouldn't stand on ceremony; if she has heard nothing once the initial wedding plans are under way, she's perfectly free to call the mother of the bride to discuss apparel options.